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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in panthertriad's LiveJournal:

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    Monday, August 20th, 2007
    9:05 pm
    First day of Psych Nursing
    This is one of my first assignments.. for the first day of school.. so.. I'll invite you all to play along too.

    I'll repost it later with my responses... my actual.. serious.. introspective responses.... gawed.. I hate psych evals...

    WHO AM I?
    Getting to Know Myself and Letting Others Know Me

    Mental health nursing begins with knowing yourself and understanding your behavior, feelings and needs. The nurse must recognize her/his own needs or she/he may try to gratify those needs at the expense of the patient.

    Take time to reflect on the following exercises and then answer the questions as openly and honestly as you can. This assignment does not have to be handed in to your clinical teacher. It is your choice to share as much or as little as you wish but the assignment is mandatory althrough there is no grade for it. Confidentiality is respected.

    Identifying and Expressing Aspects of Myself.
    Write 15 adjectives which describe you most accurately.
    Positive:
    Negative:

    My Goals
    What are your goals regarding your career.
    What are your personal life goals.

    Getting to know myself and letting others know me
    Complete the following statements

    My name is
    My titles are
    my reason for becoming a member of this group is
    Right now I feel
    When I meet people I feel
    When I feel anxious I usually
    when I enter a room full of people, I feel
    I am happiest when
    The one thing that makes me very angry is
    When I am rejected I usually
    when I am angry I usually
    My most pleasant memory is
    Authoritarian leaders make me feel
    in a group I usually get most involved when
    to me, taking orders from another person
    In a working meeting having an agenda is
    the emotion I find most difficult to control is
    My weakest point is
    I love
    I feel jealous about
    My strength
    I am afraid of
    I am ashamed of
    I believe in
    the things I like best about myself are
    My greatest ambition in life is
    To me nursing is

    Self Assessment
    Self-Awareness is difficult, personal and private. It is not an easy task. You cannot know every aspect of your personality and your behavior. Some people avoid understanding. They work at keeping themselves hidden both to themselves and others. Self-awareness allows for personal improvement.

    Can I discuss problems with others?
    Do I have close relationships? With whom?
    What dod I do when I disagree with others? Fight or Withdraw?
    How do I handle stress? What situations are stressful to me?
    Do I consider others around me? Do I usually think of myself? Do I always think of others?
    How do I respond to the people with whom I work?

    What do I do when I become threatened or scared?
    Do I become defensive? Most people do, but how do I react?
    Do I recognize when I am anxious? What type of physiological and psychological signs are shown?
    What type of adaptive mechanisms do I use?
    How do I respond when others are anxious?
    How do I respond to a withdrawn person? or to an angry or sexually aggressive person?
    do I use displacement? i.e. taking my feelings out on other people?
    Do I use projection? i.e. attributing my feelings of inadequacy to others?
    do I use intellectualization? i.e. knowledge and intellectual verbiage to cover up when I am afriad?

    What do i think about? what is on my mind alot?
    What percentage of my thoughts center on myself?
    what is on my mind when I am caring for my clients?
    what do I daydream about?
    what are my dreams like?
    what type of feelings do I have when I dream?
    Sunday, August 19th, 2007
    10:22 pm
    Explaining my whole summer would take several days of me writing.. and writing and writing... I have stories.. I have pictures..

    so.. I'll try something different.. I'll try instead to give you a feel of what it was like instead.

    You look up, as a calming clean wind ruffles your hair, and stare wide eyed, at the vast majesty above. A billion uncounted stars blazing fiercely in the night sky, tiny pinpricks of light mankinds attempt to mimic them moving through the inky darkness. Shooting stars blaze firey short lived trails. There is no civilization except for what we ourselves have created. The outside world doesn't exist. Everyone you know and love could have died in a nuclear holocaust and you'd never know. It's not something that worries you though, because you're outside of it all now. There is rarely the buzz and hum of electricity. It smells like campfire, and the heady tang of exertion sweat. You're stiff and sore and gritty feeling, covered in sand and mud and blood, and it's a good feeling.

    You're surrounded not by friends, but by your tribe, bound by initiation rituals and the same comraderie you see in WWII films. Working in the camp is a cross between fighting on a battlefield, being a cowboy herding cattle, and working backstage for a very long 7 week play.

    Time flows how it wants to. A few hours will pass in a flash, and an afternoon will seem like a week. You feel the footsteps of someone approaching vibrating through the earth, a mixture of sand and wood and leaves. At night, you're lulled to sleep by the lonely call of loons.

    You're the big brother to a hundred and sixty kids who eat, sleep and play together. After the first week, you have nothing new to say, and old stories are rehashed and respun, new events become treasured jewels.

    And then you step from isolation, and arrive back in the city. And it's LOUD. and BUSY. You notice ceilings.. and artifical lighting. A room full of grown-ups is intimidating. Your sinuses swell and try to drown you, the air is filthy, hot and humid. You bump into people, stumble when walking on concrete, every face is new. The people you knew have all changed, but you've changed more. The simple act of drinking water makes you gag, as you taste the so called purifiying agents. Urban life... Civilization... You're not back for an hour before you dream of returning.. an end to the Off Season... So you can get..

    back to camp, where you've left your life behind.

    Current Music: IMMEDIATE MUSIC - Holy (Choir)
    Friday, August 17th, 2007
    9:22 pm
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPWZNLO0X3A

    this is what I did this summer....

    the Bonfire
    12:13 am
    I'm back.
    Friday, June 22nd, 2007
    11:01 am
    Well. I was going to destroy this journal but I guess I'll wait till next summer when my course is complete. Afterall.. That's what this is for anyways.

    So, I'm off for the summer. My infrequent postings will now drop to zilch until I return.

    Till then, take care everyone. I'm off to better myself.
    Monday, June 11th, 2007
    7:53 pm
    *Squints up at the sun*

    The many seasons have passed for this journal.

    Indeed... for my whole livejournal life...

    Winter is coming soon.

    Much of my life is a mandela it seems.
    Sunday, June 10th, 2007
    12:49 pm
    Top ten reasons to date a nurse:

    10. White scrubs are see-through
    9. We are clean
    8. We know the anatomy of the body and all it's secret places
    7. We know mouth to mouth
    6. 2 words-sponge bath
    5. We don't gag
    4. We always have a rubber on hand
    3. We can go all night
    2. We have restraints and are not afraid to use them
    1. We know how to penetrate things
    Wednesday, June 6th, 2007
    2:32 pm
    Well.. Contract is in the mail....

    I'm going to be the assistant nurse for a summer camp.. helping the full nurse to take care of 300 kids....

    man... this is going to be a weird summer.
    Tuesday, June 5th, 2007
    10:23 pm
    Toronto
    So.

    I had my vacation, courtesy of Jay, down in Toronto... Wow.... what.. a crazy... messed... up.. freakin... city...

    though.. I did technically sign up for the jaded cynical tour of TO....

    4 million people, all crammed into a jumbled mess of ridiculously high skyscrapers (In ottawa, height of buildings is determined by distance from parliment hill, in TO there is no limit...) and a mixture of decaying urban and sprawling suburbia.

    I did the lazy gay man's tour. So, walked around downtown, saw the village(wow.. an actual gay village), had gay cuisine (inside joke), did the queer as folk pilgrimage/debauchery, met up with some togas, smoked shesha(sp?) in little lebanon, almost hit some pedestrians with an SUV, almost hit some cyclers with the SUV, almost got hit by SUV's, saw some hazy sky, watched a lot of rain and discovered the green twist apple flavour of juicy fruit turns to vomity slime in my mouth in 5 minutes.

    oh.. and began to usher in the apocalypse at Toronto... I got there.. and *drum roll*

    in the first hour we watched 30 fire trucks race around the city
    had the subway system shut down on a saturday night
    "Wow, that is the biggest pottery barn I have ever seen" then 3 fire trucks slam to a halt in front of it and the guys race inside
    had 4 days of stormy weather
    walked obliviously right through a major drug deal
    saw five separate incidents involving emergency services at the apartment building across the street from where I was staying
    was attacked by a mob of pigeons (ok, 3, but they were big ass pigeons)
    and where ever we went glass got broken, traffic ground to a halt, people stumbled and it was otherwise ridiculously chaotic...

    good fun.
    Tuesday, May 29th, 2007
    12:30 am
    Monday, May 28th, 2007
    2:25 pm
    So my dad's work is having a team building scavenger hunt and he's looking for ideas...

    Small things.. or photo opportunities.... available in the Ottawa Downtown Core.

    if any of you have any suggestions I can pass on to him, or heck, previous lists from your old scavenger hunts.. that would be awesome.
    Monday, May 21st, 2007
    5:24 pm
    DONE.. yeah.. that's right.. DONE....
    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE.......

    My PART is DONE.... DONE...

    and just in time.. I think I'm about to go blind if I stare at my screen anymore....

    *realized he still hasn't renamed the chapters or counted them yet.*

    Son of gun!

    But.. No Matter... that can't cheapen this wonderous savouring of victory!... oh no... It's DONE.... my edits are DONE.

    My Work.. On the first book.. is DONE...
    12:52 pm
    *gasps of JOY*
    The Machall people have a NEW comic!

    Oh.. I thought they had abandoned the comic world forever!

    http://www.threepanelsoul.com/view.php?date=2006-11-05

    And I have to admit.. I love the art....
    Saturday, May 19th, 2007
    5:41 pm
    Because this child is better coordinated than anyone reading this will EVER be.....

    Wednesday, May 16th, 2007
    12:36 am
    This drunken paranoid note brought to you by the letter K and Y and the number 7
    I puff out/pucker my lips when I'm thinking....

    I Knew I did this...

    I didn't think anyone else noticed...

    after one person pointed it out... someone else confirmed it....

    *goggle-eyed freakout*
    Sunday, May 13th, 2007
    4:04 pm
    Rage
    Well.. this is embarassing....

    the combination of final exams and the subliminal effects of nicotine withdrawl have caused me to go insane...

    or... are driving me insane...

    I haven't slept for more than an hour at a time in about a week now... I can't concentrate... so obviously I can't study.. and it's getting a little stressful.

    I just called my dad on the cellphone and told him to pick me up a pack before I snapped and hurt someone..

    cause lordy lordy have I ever come close...

    if I can't stop again in a few days... I'll go visit the hypnotist when she comes around again in July....
    I still don't actually want to smoke.... there are no cravings... the idea that I WILL be smoking horrifies and disgusts me..

    Desperate times call for desperate measures...
    Saturday, May 12th, 2007
    7:35 pm
    OMG....

    GET OUT OF MY HEAD UKRAINIAN! GET OUT!~!~!~~ AERRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH



    {A friendly editors note from Darkmatt}
    This is the submission from Ukraine for the Eurovision song contest... It is perhaps THE most addictive and nerve splintering song we have ever heard...

    And apparently it came in second... in I believe the semifinals...
    4:46 pm
    From Inked Blog - I always wondered about this

    Break the Tattoo Code - The Tear drop Tattoo



    Tattooing has served many functions during its mottled history, from
    social status in Japan, to identification in Nazi Germany, from body
    art in Tahiti to underground code in the underworld around the globe.


    The tradition of coded tattoos is still prevalent, though the
    meaning of the various tattoos changes with the passage of time and
    region. Generally, coded tattoos are associated with prison and gangs.
    Let’s explore the meaning of some of these coded symbols.


    tear.jpg
    Tear drop tattoos


    The teardrop tattoo is typically a prison tattoo. Traditionally
    placed next to the eye, either left or right, this striking mark makes
    its wearer appear to be permanently crying.


    While many prison tattoos are ethnicity specific, the teardrop is seen equally across the board.


    Originally, in North America, the teardrop meant that the wearer had
    committed at least one murder. In some places, it meant that the wearer
    had committed a murder in jail. This tattoo then had the power to warn
    away other convicts, and establish an image for the wearer, of
    self-defense that is imperative in the prison system.


    This symbol has evolved to represent family or friends of the
    prisoner who have died while the wearer is incarcerated. This is a very
    different implication, as it represents true grief, rather than an
    morbidly ironic gesture. When the tear drop represents the death of a
    loved one, the tattoo implies that the wearer is unable to cry real
    tears while in the prison system, and must use ink, instead.


    Sometimes described as meaning ‘a mother’s son is gone’, the teardrop represents death in both North American examples.


    In Australia, the teardrop has an entirely different meaning. It is
    forcibly marked on convicts who are accused child molesters. This mark
    is then used as a justification for the beatings and abuse of the
    wearer. The teardrop in this case, represents the tears that the
    convict will cry, eternally.

    Wednesday, May 9th, 2007
    7:00 pm
    *crawls out of the whole in the ground*

    is Reaper's Gale out yet?

    *squints in the bright light*
    Monday, May 7th, 2007
    11:28 pm
    King Prude - The unswayable
    It basically feels like....

    I'm me.. and I'm trying to explain, dissuade and reject a really horny guy, who wants to have a great deal of sex with me...

    It's the exact same mental feeling... and almost the exact same mental arguments.... set to loud bass music, I feel like I'm back at the bars.....

    Thank gawd....

    Cause no one says no to sex like I do...

    There is a reason the bartender laughingly calls me Mr. Flirty

    Current Music: Phantom Planet - California
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